The theme of this story: humorous transformation. The main characters: nervous cab driver and unambitious assassin. The major event of the story: funeral.
Max fought back a hard swallow as the bile seemed to rise in his throat. This woman...this gorgeous woman...really gave him a sense of dread and for no real reason. She didn't look very menacing, but the way she carried herself...the odd accent...the way she constantly smiled..it just un-nerved him.
"Yes, MaHx, you see thees fun-ur-al I am goingk to is for a very vile man. And I should know just how vile he vas...I used to be married to him."
"Oh wow...I'm...I'm...sorry to hear that." Max stammered as he rounded the corner onto 34th street, the part of Manhattan known as "Hell's Kitchen".
"Don't be sorry...he deserved it. I only go out of respect to his family. You see, they were vonce kind to me ahnd I owe them a debt that I can never repay.
Feigning a knowing nod, Max slowed as the traffic thickened and the rain began to fall harder. "Well...uh...how did he die? If ya don't mind me askin', that is..."
"Of course not, MaHx. You see....he vas keeled by a professional ahssassin." Another smile crossed her blood red lips, "He vas keeled by me."
Max's blood ran cold and his fingers gripped the steering wheel until his knuckles turned white. The woman in the back leaned in put her palm flat to the divider glass. "Oh do not worry, MaHx...I haf geeven keeling up. Besides, that line of work was just a passing fancy as I did not make much money frahm eet...nor vas it very fulfilling."
"Yer kiddin'.....right? I mean...you an assassin? You don't look the type...and, if so, why ya telling me all this?" Max had never been so happy to see an address in all his years as a cabbie and he quickly slid to the curb and put the car in park.
"Vell Mahx, one thing my many, many years has taught me ees that confession is good for the soul...the irony being that I do not have....a soul." Gazing into the mirror, Max watched in horror as the woman's perfectly white incisors began to grow, the whites of her eyes disappeared, becoming pure onyx and two, small, horns sprouted from just underneath her bangs. "Besides....you vill not tell anywahn....vill you?",the now decidedly demonic looking woman said as she quickly resumed her disguise of just your plain old, gorgeous, brunette.
Shaking now, and sweating profusely, Max's heart hammered against his chest while he shook his head. "No...'course not..I wouldn't....uhhh...uhhh...AAAHHH..." Grabbing his left arm, Max suddenly slumped over, his head banging into the top of the steering wheel as he took his last breath.
"No, I guess you von't." The woman chuckled as she stepped out of the cab, her long legs carrying her to the door where a figure in a hood and cloak met her...it's face obscured by shadow, but it had a definite skull like quality. Setting what looked like a large, shiny silver, scythe against the door frame, the cloaked figure motioned her in.
"There ees another vone out in the cab for you. Now, where ahr the hors d'oeuvres?", she smiled.